What’s one positive trait you’ve gained because of BPD?
Last Updated: 18.06.2025 12:30
My twin will have involuntary pissed himself, but not me at least not, that day!
Im dying but, im not bitter.
They are buried together, in the same grave..
Why do you allow your cat to lie in bed with you?
A line in front of him, from the eldest to the youngest.
At this time i had honed my heart to the same, as that of a lion and i knew i wouldn’t beg or cry ,nor plead.
Due to the real legacy of trauma (B.P.D)
What does it feel like when a guy cums in your ass?
Especially a lifetime of it.
I was writing from the time i was a small child.
Another so called friend had bit the dust..
One of his many names for me was Runt .He like that it rhymed with (well you know)
Im a true spealist, because i study it for years .And i still do..
But there where , these other acts only us 2 girls, would receive, (When id have rather had his lump hammer , and chisel.).
What are the signs of mild autism in a child?
Insight, and i can spot a wrongin from 3 miles away.
That life, was meant to be , as the world teaches us great lessons, and leaves us many gifts.
It comes from Big T Trauma and is no fault of anyone who has it.
Which feels physically better for guys: vaginal sex or anal sex?
On the 31st of Jan this month .
Do all the shopping, and cooking and look after all the dogs.
So i became my fathers slave and he hated me the most.
What was your most memorable combat mission during the Vietnam War?
This is soul school!.
But it wasn’t much.
Anyway, i told my husband ,and he was gobsmacked.
What toxic behavior has been normalized by society?
.I left my 2 sons and my husband to do it. Instead of spending the day with them
Even in the coal hole, i said the lines in my head..
Thats was my nicest nick name for him
Harvard gastroenterologist shares 4 bloat-busting tricks that actually work - Times of India
As is all addictions, people can’t leave off.
He did pay me though, i made him (.After i’d trudged miles to get his pension ) Before ,it all was gone, over the pubs counter!
Then he’ d take out his beloved lump hammer ,show it to the kids.
Why do liberals think it is okay to steal votes while the rest of us obey the law(s)?
And don,t forget my 4 months alone, in the incubator. Knowing my brother in the womb and my mother voice .The baby knows she’s alone!
I think the readers, may guess!
I said to her
Do humans know everything they need to know?
We were all going out this night to a fancy resteraunt.
But people really die of the Big T Trauma!!
She was in good health!
Why do old men think young women and girls would want them over guys their own age?
She stayed with him because she thought he,d grow out of it. He didn’t of course!
She said her life with him ,was love, and spoke to me of all the passion, it had brought her.
Its a big thing in the States for the last 25 years.
How are Hinduism and Sikhism related, considering they both originated in Punjab, India?
I got to know the terrible awful childhood, he had himself. And his Jolly Pub Persona.
Ive learnt so much.
Would this be the day?
Thats being isolated in a house, locked up as a child .We never saw any people except in School and we had no relatives in Liverpool!
I did it because my mum asked me too!
19 years ,i spent with dear old papa.
She got all dolled up, but it looked as she was dressed up to play the part of , Florence Nightingale ,as she descended down the cottage stairs ,like a Queen.
They look at me amazed ,and ask me how i could possibly know it?
I forgave my father,, and in those years i cleaned and looked after him .
Like some twisted love , they where addicted to each other
And ive living now since 2005, on disablement .(Which is a pittance)
I was seconnd youngest,
Took her away on holiday ,with us, my 2 pugs her dog, a Jack Russell.
I ended up cooking for her, and bringing her eveywhere with us.
As his daughter ,he didn’t even think I wouldn,t do it. (Look after him)
And who doesn’t know suffering?
My life is so biszare .
I am a twin , my twin is a boy called Alan. I had a sister and 2 other brothers
I of course replied” arh beautiful!
Why do we forgive? Because if we don,t
But it has taught me many things other people will , never know!
The only way to get rid of it forgood ,is sommence therapy,
Who then, do I blame.?
Its like, taking poison, and hoping the other person will die.
But im an empath, and i help lots of people.
When he wanted one of his lessons to be taught!
I only stopped writing poetry recently, because , of my brain tumor
She loved him until the end.
I watched his eyes light up and his twisted smile rejoice, in his joy of it all.
So he went home with my mum to her 2 other children.
I was the most vunerable of my siblings. I was born small ,and was sickly ,and of course none of us could ever thrive!
As i said though i will be 64 on my last birthday!
Mine was extreme ,and lasted 19 years
But i went to school ,and was locked up evey evening , until he was off out on a bender..then mum would set us free, and we,d be bouncing off the walls,
I suffer greatly, because of BPD..
But ive been too sick for many years..
So, i spoilt her more .
Stress hormones Adrenaline and Cortosol ,would have flooded my brain, and they never left it!!!!
His mum and dad ,were Alcoholics!
We were not on the streets..
My place (mostly )was the coal hole..it was a small room heaped with coal .
Then later on when my husband had gone to the bar..she started telling me, that they where having a affair, and that he loved her much more then me ,and other loads of visious lies.
As she had lost her son ,to fatty liver disease!
I know ,a lot about trauma.
He took out the hammer, and explained again, how the smallest tap ,of this hammer would kill me in a second.
I have no regrets .
The same beautiful brown eyes my mother loved so much!
Your thinking ,but those kids would have been street wise?
And as she herself ,wasn’t kissed or touched as a child.
It will be my last birthday ,as im dying of a brain tumor and 8 other autoimune diseases.
This is how, and why children get BPD.
Trauma lives in the body, as ive explained, but it actually this that kills you in the end.
It was going to be , some day.
What did i know ?
She was deluded, and thought she could stay on for the reminder of the holiday!
Youll pack your bags and leave Dorset.
I forgave my father, and i took care of him ,until his death in 1999..my mum left us on the 29th Jan 1998.
With Catholic nuns and Church on Sundays.
I let him have the joy of his friends( that i would never know myself.!)
I was grabbed out of my mother hung upside down, and rushed up to the prenatal ward, to spend 4 mths alone, with, only medical staff.
Everytime, i saw a chronically ill person in middle years.
(And it was in our own minds.)
He knew the spot.
Why did i forgive my father ?
He’d sit me down, and stand behind the chair, Then he’d make a great show of his beauty (the chesil )and place it behind my neck ,at the base!
And i know him well ,and every thing about him. This relationship, is the only real one iIve been able to keep!
Because , i didnt have the heart to hurt my friend.!.
My mother wasn’t a tactile women ..only as babes could she touch us. After we grew ,she couldn,t touch any of us.
The coal was sharp, and i usually had no underware! So my bare arse ,was cut and rossened on the coal..
I worked then as a chef ,and a very good one.
But i am married 43 years to my husband this July !
My family never makes their pension either.
Im still living with it.
I was scared of men, in general
Her first husband, had been a gay man ,and he was a lovely person.
My mum and dad in the seventies!
But he said ,he was sick of her anyway ,and only put up with her as i had a friend ,and seemed to be happy.
He was a brick layer (when he worked at all) and he carried his tools around ,hanging from a money belt.
And, all my friends down the years ,where users.
Trauma never leaves you! Its actually lives in the fashia ,of the body .The connective tissue.
I couldn’t, believe it.
She married twice! .
One cannot hold on to bitterness.
Im kind ,and give many things, inc money ,to any of persons in need. I have a groups of homeless beggars ..i help out daily. They all know me by name!
I might have to go back 30 generations or more..
And when you live in a life , of being terrified, and shocked, and permantly stressed; especially as a child born in to all this .
I write beautiful poetry .
All the time i was locked up.
Rather to engertic for me ,with my terrible health, but i was left to run the house, it was a Cottage in Dorset.
My only sister also couldn,t make her life work.
Those are used to try and block the pain, like that of my life out..
Although he,d calmed down a bit ..he still shouted his orders at me and thought , my older sister would be better at the job..
Put me off passion for life!!
My familys so full of ancestral BIG T Trauma.
I could never make a relationship work though!
Comes on , in middle age.
One women pretended to my husband she wanted to see me for coffee ,and make friends.
As i do to all so called friends.?
Although we always gave her a kiss on the cheek. She would shrink away from it!
Why ? because Trauma depletes the immune system.you get terribley ill , with chronic disease from all the horror ,and stress of it.
Was to survive, this bastard.
I was very sick at this time too.
5 of us kids, and it wasn’t a big house.
Its mostly always from childhood abuse .
I had hoped to write a book about this .
I waited trembling.
We born here on earth , for the soul to learn , the contrast, of heaven.
He isn,t a very sexual person at the best of times!
As i gave and gave ,everything to people, they began to use me.
When she asked me how she looked .
I was 9 years of age.
But my sister and my other 3 brothers wouldn’t have come near him every again!
We wern’t close any more, the family fractured, after my Mothers death, and seeing me annoyed them ,as i was the familys scapegoat..
You’d think that being brought up for so long, in those terrible circumsatances ,i would know the ways of people ,and the world, but i wasn,t in , nor of the world .
We all went to grammer schools
Im constanly in a state of FLIGHT or FIGHT my whole life
And if you hold on to hate you only die inside yourself,!
And i lived it daily.
He had many friends, who didn,t know the home devil he was, for his sake ,i never enlighted them either.
He weighed in at 5 lbs .I was the second born, and i weighed 3 and a half pounds.
I do have abandomment issues but they come from being left alone ,without my mum, or any of my family in a incubator for 4 months.
She wouldn,t have been !
One was a lump hammer, another was a iron chisel.
I wasn’t taught any boundries, our home ,was like any war zone , and Dad told us, he had bodies buried, under the floor boards.
The only rule us 5 kids had .
One cannot live in the past .
I did write a poem about him though, and my mum.
But im a psyci anyway, and i read energy and people, .
I only knew my twisted world , and there, is no choice for a child but to live in it. Or Die in it!
She died young (from the stress and abuse of Big T Trauma) of liver cancer!
But im dying ,and its too late for me.
Because huge Trauma like mine is alive.
My dad was a alcholic psychopath, and violent in the extreme.
She found it foreign!.
BPD only comes to a person who has suffered childhood trauma.
I will be 64.
But, we were locked up after school.
He was dying to do it , i knew.
I never cut or harmed myself..
I had many talking therapys , but they just don,t work.
His abuse (his own) began at 2 years of age. His mothers friend, sexually abused him, from the age of 2.
Anyway ,i could never hold on to a relationship.
Being very nice and never wanting to say the wrong thing.
And as runt ,of the litter .Which of course, i actually was!
You don’ t get a state one here , in England ? until your at least 67 yrs old ! Im 63.
For him, I cleaned and cooked and shopped, and spent the whole day, doing a weeks work) in the only day off, i had, besides Sunday.)
He said i’d end up like her, and he laughed his big rolicking bear of a laugh!
Where the ultimate outsiders.
The apprentership one gets in Extreme Big T Trauma childhood is insight and extreme awarness.
I immediatly know and see what their chidhood was. I tell them you had a awful time in childhood.
I had offered the whole expense of the holiday to her, free.
So whats the point in blame.
I don,t even have a pension.
He said i reminded him of an old aunt ,who used to beat him, and when the menapause came, she was placed in a mental home and never was released ,until she died.
We didn’t no it wasn;t normal life..we were isolated, and taken from Dublin in Ireland ,where our whole mothers family lived , to Liverpool in England!
Yes, a stroke or heart attack is the reason on your death certificate.
He’d bring us out ,and we would form the position .
Also my liver and lungs are fatally diseased!
We could never speak unless he spoke to us!
Ther’s very good reasons why i was left alone.
She was a women, a mother with her own children!.
He call us down, from where ever he stashed each one of us ,that day ! We were kept seperate.!
She died at 55 of colon cancer.
He resisted the act ,that day.